teen girls
Anxiety
Many teen girls experience symptoms of anxiety that cause havoc on their lives. Sometimes you can be headed to an event you are really excited about and then get plagued with the “What if’s”. Anxiety feels like an unwelcome guest in your mind, always lingering in the corners of your awareness, waiting for the right moment to pounce.
You are not alone.
Anxiety is a rising epidemic in teen girls. Many of your friends who seem to have it all together are plagued with similar feelings of dread, fear, and panic. Opening up to a close, trusted friend may provide some relief for you. When you realize others feel the same feelings of doubt and trepidation entering into certain social situations or before a test in school, could help you to normalize your experience a bit.
Some anxiety is normal.
Some anxiety is normal in life and will be experienced by everyone. Having feelings of fear before a major test when you don’t think you studied enough, feeling anxious before showing up to a party when you are not sure who will be there, being nervous to talk to a boy you like, worrying you might not perform well in your sport or extra-curricular activity; these are all examples of a fairly normal experience.
When life-circumstances are to blame.
Sometimes we question why we are feeling these feelings of anxiety when our lives are actually chaotic and stressful. Have you experienced a recent loss or a past loss that you have never fully processed? Are your parents fighting more than normal? Is a sibling struggling with something significant and you know it but there is nothing you can do? Do you have an angry teacher who yells and causes you to feel disregulated? These are just a few of the things that could be going on in your life to cause you to feel anxious. We sometimes shelve hard things in our minds and then our bodies begin to respond with anxiety and we are left confused as to why our bodies are doing this! Pay attention to your surroundings and begin to notice what may be at the root of your feelings of anxiety.
When it is concerning.
Anxiety is of concern when it causes you miss out on the normal parts of life. The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Health Disorders says that Anxiety is at the point of significance when:
It is excessive and occurs more days than not for at least 6 months
The person finds it difficult to control the worry
The anxiety and worry are associated with three or more of the following six symptoms (with at least some symptoms present for more days than not for the past 6 months).
Restlessness or feeling keyed up or on edge
Being easily fatigued
Difficulty concentrating or mind going blank
Irritability
Muscle tension
Sleep disturbance (difficulty falling or staying asleep, or restless unsatisfying sleep)
All the above need to be present for a formal diagnosis, but any of these symptoms can feel overwhelming and concerning.
What to do.
Be kind to yourself.
If you are struggling with minor feelings of anxiety, take a minute to tell yourself that you are okay. You can actually be a voice that reminds yourself, kindly, that you are safe and you are okay. Try some deep breathing exercises and progressive muscle relaxation. Here is a video example of a breathing exercise. Here is a video showing progressive muscle relaxation.
Limit Social Media.
Social media has been tied to anxiety and depression, especially in teen girls.
Over the last decade, increasing evidence has identified the potential negative impact of social media on adolescents. According to a research study of American teens ages 12-15, those who used social media over three hours each day faced twice the risk of having negative mental health outcomes, including depression and anxiety symptoms.
source: https://www.yalemedicine.org/news/social-media-teen-mental-health-a-parents-guide
Seek help.
If your anxiety seems more serious to you, it is time to ask for help. Tell your parents or a trusted adult and ask to see a professional counselor. A therapist can help you find the root cause of your anxiety, process feelings around this, and walk with you through your story to heal from the hard things you have endured. You don’t have to have any answers; a trained therapist can help you navigate these things. A therapist will also give you tools to help you cope with your anxiety more easily as you are processing the deeper things that may be underlying causes. A therapist may also suggest you see a psychiatrist. Psychiatrists are medical doctors for mental health. They can prescribe you with medication that can help you better cope with your anxiety symptoms. Often times, therapy and medication together are very effective in helping ease your symptoms.
depression
During your teen years, a girl’s emotions can fluctuate regularly and depression can feel like a regularly occurring reality. You do not have to accept depression as your new reality! Here are some things to keep in mind:
Pay attention to your cycle.
Take a few months and chart your cycle (when your period starts and ends). In addition, chart your days you are feeling down/depressed. Take some time to look at this and see if you notice any correlation. The hormone fluctuation that occurs around a girl’s cycle is intense and can sometimes cause huge dips in mood. If you notice a correlation and it is severe, ask a parent or guardian to allow you to see a doctor. They can prescribe medication to help with these symptoms. If you notice a correlation that is less severe, continue to use this information to encourage yourself during these dips in mood that it is a physical issue and it will pass. Be prepared the following months once you know your patterns and you can even put warnings on your calendar that it is coming. Have some things you do during this time of the month that prove helpful, such as going outside in the sun, talking with friends, or eating ice cream!
Limit Social Media.
Once again, there have been many, many studies correlating social media use and rises in anxiety and depression in teen girls. This article is for you and not your parents, so you have the ability to make a decision on what you want to do with the info. If you desire to make a change but you don’t know how, here are a few suggestions:
set time limits on your mobile device for social apps and sites. You can even have a friend or parent put in a passcode that you don’t know so you cannot override it. This will help you stick to your time-limits and since you initiated it, you can always change it later if you want.
try not to look at your phone in bed before attempting to sleep. Instead, read a book, draw, or write in a journal. This one small change will help you sleep better at night and will help aid you in avoiding anxiety and depressive symptoms at night.
A report from the surgeon general pulls together research that links social media use and poor mental health in adolescents, such as a 2019 study that found teens who spent more than three hours a day on social media "faced double the risk of experiencing poor mental health outcomes, including symptoms of depression and anxiety."
Don’t isolate.
When feeling depressed, you may be tempted to isolate. Try to limit the time you are alone when you are feeling down. Curt Thompson, in his book “Soul of Shame”, says that even when you are with people you don’t even like, community is the best thing for your brain. It will be hard to do when you are feeling down, but forcing yourself to be around others will help ease your depressive symptoms.
Get help.
If you have tried these other things and your symptoms persist, or if you have been feeling down for a while, seek out professional help. It is time to talk to your parents about how you are feeling and ask to speak to a counselor. Having someone to sit with you and work to understand your pain is very beneficial. A professional counselor can also tell you if it is time to seek medication as an additional tool for helping with your depression.
if you are feeling suicidal.
If you are feeling helpless and at the point of having suicide ideation, call the suicide hotline number (988 on your phone) or get yourself to the nearest emergency room.